Who is the Master?

It has been awhile since I have spent time in my daughter's ballet class.  I had gotten into the habit of dropping them off and waving goodbye, as the thought of chasing a two year old around the lobby, trying to keep her quiet, while big and pregnant was far too much for me during those last few months.  But last week, both girls asked that I come and see what they had been learning. It was a delight to be "back in action," waving to my little ballerinas and praising them on the specific accomplishments.  It even was a joy to chase my toddler around, watching her attempt to mimic the big girls.  I noticed something as I looked around the lobby filled with moms - no one was talking, no one was watching, everyone was looking at their phones.  It stopped me for a moment.  It was as if I suddenly stepped into this alternate reality, and in a way, I had.

I Was Ignorant...

I'm pro-life.  I've always been pro-life.  I've always known that I don't support abortion, but I have
never really paid attention to the reality of abortion.  Recently, with the Kermit Gosnell trial going on, as well as undercover videos being posted by Live Action, I have been exposed to the details of abortion, details that I happily ignored up until now.

There is something about holding my own newborn son, loving him, nursing him, looking at his perfect little hands and feet - when I compare the beauty of life found in him with the thought of little babies being torn apart, limb by limb in the mother's womb, babies that are being born alive and fighting for their lives while being left to die - that is the horror of abortion.  I can't help but think "they're killing babies just like him.  Abortion is someone ripping him apart in my womb.  Abortion is him being born alive and put in a toxic solution."  I was ignorant to the sheer evil that is happening every day in our country, and now my heart is grieving.  There was a part of me that never watched videos or read much about abortion because I didn't want to know, I didn't want to know how truly horrible it is, but I can no longer be ignorant.  We can no longer be ignorant.  For weeks the mainstream media has ignored the Kermit Gosnell trial, desiring to keep Americans ignorant of the infanticide that is happening, but we need to know.  We need to know just how bad it is so we will motivated to help fight abortion.  Here are some links to videos and articles that will disturb you, I promise.  They have kept me awake at night.  But don't be ignorant.  Learn, pray, fight, and support pro-life people and organizations like Live Action, Abby Johnson, and Life Site News.

"But I feel that the greatest destroyer of peace today is abortion, because it is a war against the child - a direct killing of the innocent child - murder by the mother herself. And if we accept that a mother can kill even her own child, how can we tell other people not to kill one another?" ~Mother Teresa

Please look at the following links, it will only take a few moments of your time:

Mom Screams for Help as Baby is Born Alive

Abortionist Strangles Baby

Live Action's Inhuman Videos

A Charlotte Mason Day

I have been a bit behind in just about everything these days....laundry... dishes... school work... blogging... pictures... did I mention laundry?  Playing catch up is difficult after having a baby, couple that with my husband getting a second job, and I don't find much time to sit down at the computer.  I really don't miss the exorbitant amount of time I was spending on the internet during my pregnancy, but I do miss writing and sharing on here. 

During my pregnancy, our homeschooling consisted of math, some reading outloud, and....that is about it.  I was barely surviving day to day; now that I am back on my feet, we have started having more Charlotte Mason inspired days.  The weather has been beautiful, and I can just feel the outdoors beckoning us to come exploring.  Today was one of those "Charlotte Mason Days" where the girls and I basked in the glorious spring sunshine while tracking down and identifying flowers for Mother Mary.  Our goal for the month of May is to keep fresh flowers on the altar for Mary.  This was one of those days where education was not in a lesson or worksheet, but in a way of life.  The simple delight of being outside, learning, touching, and experiencing nature, working together to make a beautiful bouquet, would have made Ms. Mason proud. Today, I played.  Tomorrow....I think the laundry is calling my name.

It's a War....and We're Losing

I came across this article titled "11 Actions That Prove Republicans Are Intent on Making 2013 a Terrible Year for Sex."  As I scrolled through their "11 Reasons,"  I was appalled.... repulsed.... I'm having trouble thinking of a strong enough word.  For those of you who want to spare yourselves the reading, let me list a few highlights for you:

"The GOP's demonization of Planned Parenthood has been far more unpopular than Santorum suggests, but that didn't stop congressional Republicans from eagerly continuing their crusade to eliminate its federal funding earlier this year with a pair of new bills that haven't moved forward."

(Isn't there a reason Planned Parenthood has been "demonized"??  Killing babies for one....)

Exhaustion, Suffering, and Joy

Well, I'm alive....sort of.  If you can count not sleeping for more than two straight hours for almost four weeks, barely keeping my living room cleaned up, and still recovering from a major surgery alive, then I count.  My brain really doesn't work nearly as well as it used to...and that whole idea of "sleep while your baby sleeps" doesn't factor in what to do with with a 6 year old, 5 year old, and 2 year old while I'm taking these naps.  As time goes by after the birth of all of our children, the difficulties of these first few months seem to dim, my perspective broadens, and I realize just how short these first few months are.  That is a good thing.  If I were to clearly remember how exhausted I feel, I don't think I could ever bring myself to look forward to another pregnancy.  Ever.

The Easter Liturgy

 I can't believe that Lent is over and we are into the Easter Triduum. This has been a strange Lent for me, with the preparation and birth of our son, I didn't do nearly as many Lenten practices and activities as in the past.  I didn't give anything up, I didn't do many crafts and teaching activities with the girls, in fact, the main theme of Lent this year was "survive."  Our oldest daughter and my husband are at Holy Thursday Mass, while I sit here in peace with the three little ones sleeping.  I miss it.  I wish I were healthy enough to attend this Mass.  I truly believe that the most beautiful part of being Catholic is the Easter Triduum.  I wrote about the beauty of the Easter liturgy last year, but every year, it touches my soul.

Welcome Edmund

I am so proud and blessed to be able to announce that Edmund Arthur Francis Plato was born March 14, 2013, one week before my scheduled c-section.  I went into labor early, you can read about it on our family blog here. He is healthy, happy, and loved beyond measure.  Our girls constantly want to hold him -we all gather around to watch him make those sweet newborn faces and stretch his arms.  He truly is a miracle, a sweet soul, formed by the grace of God.  I am tired and overwhelmed, but joyful. 

How I Grew to Love the Pope

Pope Benedict XVI, the only Pope I have ever known.  Growing up, my conception of "Pope" consisted of power-hungry men that Catholics worshiped by kissing their hands and feet.  Catholics got the Pope and Christ confused....and didn't a Pope kiss the Koran or something crazy like that?  I will admit, a HUGE obstacle to becoming Catholic lay in the idea of "Pope."  I felt like he was going to get in between myself and Christ.

When we decided to become Catholic, I was able to accept the Pope as head of the Church in an ideological realm, meaning I saw the need for a leader, or a voice here on earth.  It was a more of a practical concern, I had seen the rampant way Protestantism had divided the Body of Christ by not having a living, breathing, authority to speak to current issues; the office of Pope was an answer to this problem.  It was something I was able to accept as a necessity.

The Voice of Christ

I always love it when my children play outside - really play.  I love seeing the look of pure joy and freedom as they romp through the grass, get muddy, and live in another world.  We are a no-video games, no-TV, only-a-few-videos-here-and-there-when-mother-needs-a-little-quiet-family, so the girls spend quite a bit of time outside, but they don't always love it.  Sometimes, I think they feel as though they are being banished.  And yes, sometimes, I send them out just for the sake of banishment and a much needed break.  But today, in the sunshine, they are filled with nothing with childhood romping, stomping, and playing.

I have been spending quite a bit of time resting in these last few weeks before having the baby, and have spent (far too much) time on Pinterest.  I have enjoyed all of the tips, tricks, and ideas.  There is no possible way I will ever complete even 25% of what I have pinned, but it is fun, all the same.  I recently came across a quote that read, "The way we speak to our children becomes their inner voice."  Now, there are many, many, cheesy, inspirational quotes like this one floating around, but for some reason, this one touched me.  I haven't exactly been the kind, soft-spoken mother these days.  I have been much more of the I'm-tired-pregnant-sick-stressed-mother instead.  My words, and especially my tone have reflected all of my innner struggles and physical feelings.  Unfortunately, my children have received the brunt end of my current sufferings.

Rest for the Weary Soul

This last year has been tough for our family, very tough.  As we prepare our hearts for Lent, it feels like we have already been going through one, long-lasting Lent.  But I know we are near the end.  Thinking about Lent and my Lenten commitments, I just want peace - rest for my weary soul.  I'm not sure yet exactly what that will look like, but I know it will encompass less media, less news, less internet, and more reading, more prayer, more silence.  As I sit here drinking my coffee, working on a knitting project that I have finally started to get right (after FOUR tries!), admiring the bulbs that are starting to poke out their heads, and look at pictures from a little family get-away we took last weekend, I know peace is in our future.  In the next six weeks, our future will hopefully be more secure, flowers will have blossomed, sun will be shining more regularly, we will have given birth to our sweet baby boy, and this long period of Lent will be over.  Easter will be upon us and we will rejoice in our risen Lord.  But for now, I thank the Lord for these moments of quiet rest.

I wanted to share with you all a few pictures we took at the coast last weekend.  I am reminded of just how blessed we are to live in Oregon, surrounded by such diverse, natural beauty.